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100 Idiotic Song Lyrics

Bzzt. Wrong. You are actually a POP star. It says so on iTunes. If you cant figure out your own damn GENRE, we have another problem other than your man leaving you.

Well, maybe Wish You Were Here was alright…

You know who ELSE has a red nose? Merry Christmas,Timmy!

Shut up, I won the fucking Nobel Peace Prize.

Well shes my best friends girlShes my best friends girlbut she used to be mine

The original lyrics imply that he changes his mind similar to the way girls change clothes. How DO girls change clothes? And how is it similar to changing minds? Please explain.

You mean shes back from space. Or Jupiters atmosphere. Also, you cant have drops of Jupiter in your hair, its made of gas. Thats SCIENCE, Train.

I dont even need to provide the lyrics. Its right in the title!

What kind of monster would charge a cat rent?

Mental wounds not healingLifes a bitter shameIm going off the rails on a crazy trainIm going off the rails on a crazy train

Its the end of the world as we know it

Really? Wow, you must be some kind of loser, because Jesus didnt even try. Did she become a nun? Or did you mean Jesus, but pronounced the way Spanish people pronounce it, and you were just an ignorant American who misread the name on the note? If you are, you probably didnt follow that.

Also, why would you never go back after being given good advice? Seems kind of odd. Just saying.

Wait a minute; youre friends with DARKNESS? Only the most evil people in the universe are associated with darkness:

Ok, Miss Swift, but in case you didnt notice, this is NOT what happened in Romeo and Juliet. Maybe you just skipped the whole death part, thinking it all turned out well? Which just goes to show kids, if you want to be successful, you just need to be good-looking.

Did you try to live on your ownWhen you burned down the house and home?Did you stand too close to the fireLike a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone?

For one thing, this entire section appears in RED for some ungodly reason. Secondly, these are (once again) NOT REAL WORDS!

Gee, if hes the most famous, Id assume so.

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According to THIS asswipe, its so easy a child could do it!

Pictured: The Buggles first jam session.

But, really, besides the Wall, theyre a pretty awful band.

Heaven aint close in a place like this

You have to be talented to make it in the country music industry, but Im frankly stretching the use of the word talent when I say that. I mean, its COUNTRY.

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The resemblance to Cate Blanchett is uncanny.

For Billy Joel albums, this cover is genius.

Even when they arent feeling original, they still kick ass.

Im gonna do the things that I wanna do

Any industry allowing this man to get famous obviously doesnt require talent as a prerequisite

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In Catholic school as vicious as Roman ruleI got my knuckles bruised by a lady in blackAnd I held my tongue as she told meSon fear is the heart of loveSo I never went back

Actually, if all eyes are on YOU, its more like a peepshow! Zing!

Actually, people dont sink like stones. They float. Like pumice. So if you mean theyll sink like pumice, then yes, you got it.

Really? On a list that includes a Nazi, JFKs assassination and Doris Day, its the cola wars that drives you over the edge?

Accroches-toi a ton reveAccroches-toi a ton reveQuand tu vois ton bateau partirQuand tu sents — ton coeur se briserAccroches-toi a ton reve.

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Most of you didnt know this book existed. And that saddens me.

Unless youre Billy Joel and youre singing Piano Man (or youre Weird Al and singing Ode to a Superhero), you have no right dealing with a harmonica.

I didnt realize sociopaths were capable of forming a lasting relationship.

On the other hand… Great name for an album.

Now that shes back in the atmosphereWith drops of Jupiter in her hair, hey, hey, hey, hey

That all depends on where there actually is. Id want to be the last one in a room with a guy who will kill everyone except for the last guy to enter the room.

Seriously, were all the cover designers brain-dead?

He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ringAnd said, marry me JulietYoull never have to be aloneI love you and thats all I really knowI talked to your dad, go pick out a white dressIts a love story baby just say yes

As mammals, were all hot-blooded you fool. Regardless, with a fever of 103…. Youre either about to die or youre a gay werewolf.

Really? Was it worth losing LITERALLYevery single cent you hadjust so you could scam people in the future? Doubtful.

So I learned to dance with a hand in my pants

We watched Titanic, and it didnt make us sad

Sorry, but machines cant write music. Only people can do that. Heck, we still cant do that, and this song was written in, what, the Stone Age?

Do they still hang? No, they dont. Dont worry, Tommy Shaw, youll get either lethal injection or the chair, depending on what state youre in. Heck, maybe youll luck out and they give you life! Dont jump to conclusions about hangmen.

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The song is about a romance between two people with a foot fetish.

And even if hes talking about some catastrophic event, why the FUCK do you feel fine? You should be at least mildly concerned.

I dont mind you coming herewasting all my timeCause when youre standing oh so nearI kinda lose my mind

What marching band related memories made your father bring this up?

But do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?

Somehow this is connected to being your own grandpa….

Rock and Roller cola wars, I cant take it anymore

What about sleep? On a side note, maybe you could call up Oingo Boingo? Theyve got some wild parties my friend.

Never gonna give you upNever gonna let you downNever gonna run around and desert youNever gonna make you cryNever gonna say goodbyeNever gonna tell a lie and hurt you

Glaciers melting in the dead of nightAnd the superstars sucked into the supermassive

Some song lyrics are beautiful. Some are funny. Some are just god damned idiotic (Im looking at YOU, Pink Floyd). Its time they were exposed!

Bland. Just like the Frays cover version. Zing!

And cats NEVER have money. I mean, why would he care if hes broke? What other alternatives are there? Something tells me this song isnt even really ABOUT cats.

I figured itd be a bit disrespectful to SpongeBob if I compared him to Hitler, so I replaced him with Glenn Beck. Which is still a bit disrespectful.

Not once in this song do they mention traveling back in time and meeting your grandmother. Not ONCE.

Im more concerned by your atrocious grammar. Really, if you can fix that, I can easily forgive your experimentation. But its DOESNT, not DONT!! Seriously!

You wrote the song for a movie about IMMORTAL vampires. Idiots.

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Then you better start swimminOr youll sink like a stone

Look at him working. Darning his socks in the night when theres nobody thereWhat does he care?

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A party without Fanta is not a party worth contemplating

Look at the stars,Look how they shine for you,And everything you do,Yeah they were all yellow,

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Dont mind me, Im just darning socks.

A song about stray cats…. called the Stray Cat Strut… by the band the Stray Cats… somethings missing from this cover.

2009 was a good year for blue people

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smoked my last cigare

Zombie marching bands would be the greatest video game enemies ever.

Think you got what it takes to write for ? Thensubmit an articleor some other pieces of content.

Umm… If she hasnt said that yet, why are you living together?

When I was a young boy,My father took me into the cityTo see a marching band.He said, Son when you grow up,would you be the savior of the broken,the beaten and the damned?He said Will you defeat them,your demons, and all the non-believers,the plans that they have made?Because one day Ill leave you,A phantom to lead you in the summer,To join The Black Parade.

Ok, Im pretty sure that Catholics dont sacrifice Christians to lions.

In the night I hear em talk, the coldest story ever toldSomewhere far along this road he lost his soulTo a woman so heartlessHow could you be so heartless?How could you be so heartless?

Send a heartbeat toThe void that cries through youRelive the pictures that have come to passFor now we stand aloneThe world is lost and blownAnd we are flesh and blood disintegrateWith no more to hate

Ok, first off, this entire song is about you proving to this person that you can do whatever you want to do. And if youre SO uncaring… why do you want them to excuse your manners?

What does masochism have to do with achieving your goals?

He cares because he doesnt want to wear socks with holes in them! Would YOU? I doubt it. If I see a pair of torn socks, I wouldnt go, Oh, shit, Im so lonely. And why would he darn socks with somebody there? Thats rude.

I would think so; arson isnt too attractive to potential roommates. No ones going to want to bunk with a guy known for burning down his own house. And why do liars look for forgiveness from stones?

Ill shine up the old brown shoes, put on a brand-new shirt.Ill get home early from work if you say that you love me.

Once again demonstrating their lack of grip with reality, Train has forgotten that they dont play Mister Mister on the radio.

It was totally worth it; I learned some great fire starting techniques

Supermassive WHAT? Black hole, Im assuming, but we cant be so sure! Also, arent the glaciers in a permanent state of melting? Why does it matter that theyre also melting in the dead of night?

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I dont know if thats really good advice, Mr. Cornell. In case you didnt notice, the ability to feel is important. For instance, feeling pain is a good indicator to stop what youre doing. Besides, if you couldnt feel, how would you have the necessary emotions to hide your hand?

Not all stars are yellow. Some are red. Some are orange. Others are blue. Fuchsia stars have been reported, but such claims are unverified.

i:3;a:2:s:5:title;s:104:94- Its the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine); R.E.M/93- My Best Friends Girl; The Cars;s:4:text;s:2922:

I wanna rock and roll all nite and party every day

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I think this sort of situation requires more than merely dancing….

Oh, sure, make the BRUNETTE the villain, THATS original.

And hes still your best friend? Pretty forgiving, dude.

a:49:i:0;a:2:s:5:title;s:68:100- Another Brick in the Wall; Pink Floyd/99- Just Dance; Lady Gaga;s:4:text;s:1422:

Who is them? Who is He? Who is She? Who is You? Quit playing the pronoun game, Kanye/White Guy from American Idol!

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Science is brought to you by Evolution: Agree with us whole-heartedly or be excluded from the scientific community for DARING to think different.

A fake Jamaican took every last dime with a scam.It was worth it just to learn some sleight-of-hand.

What?s going on on the floor?I love this record baby but I can?t see straight anymoreKeep it cool, what?s the name of this club?I can?t remember but it?s alright, a-alrightJust dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm

That is LITERALLY impossible. Seriously.

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I do too. You know WHY? Because its ALWAYS the end of the world as we know it. Think about it; every second a child is born. The world as we knew it didnt have that child in it. And yet we dont notice.

But in the music video youre neighbors…. Why does he have to drive? Also, thats a bit creepy….And I believe were all in agreement that crying is a good release of emotions. You MAKE HIM BOTTLE THAT UP! Youre damaging him psychologically! Dear God, shes right; She IS the perfect girlfriend!

All the eyes on me in the center of the ringJust like a circus (ah, ah, ahaha-hah)

Id make a comment on irreverence, but thatd be pretty hypocritical after the Spore comment. And it MIGHT be reverent. Although I doubt it.

Ha Ha, lack of communication is groovy baby!

You change your mind like a girl changes clothes

Light her hair on fire, light her hair on fire…. What, YOU dont have a mantra?

I think I kind of would mind if someones very presence made me insane.

Enough with abstracts, be straightforward!

Frankly, I dont see how the mere act of having rage will get you out of a cage. Maybe if you USED that rage. And Im afraid no amount of rage, used or otherwise, will change your status as rat. I think DNA is a bit more complicated than that.

Did I mention our Pepsi sponsorship?

I mean, I get that you could achieve their idea of heaven by playing the game Spore, but still…

Some of them want to use youSome of them want to get used by youSome of them want to abuse youSome of them want to be abused.

Why the FUCK would we go to a party where we leave our body AND soul at the door? I get leaving your body, its like a ghost party. Until you tell us to leave our soul! Whats going to the party then? Nothing! Is the party at the door? Wouldnt it get crammed with all our bodies? I mean, I guess floating souls dont take space…. But where the hell are we going to put the chips?

My heart keeps beating like a hammer

Smiles politely back at youYou stare politely right on throughSome sort of window to your right

Uh-huh. I guess that means Bye-Bye to Mr. Eyelids. Otherwise, I dont see how youll get past blinking, let alone SLEEPING. Seems like a pretty tough job.

I sued Ben Affleck…Aw, do I even need a reason?

Wouldnt eye contact be even more polite?

Leave your body and soul at the door

Either way, nothing good can come of this.

Mother told me, yes, she told me Id meet girls like you.She also told me, Stay away, youll never know what youll catch.Just the other day I heard a soldier falling off some Indonesian junk thats going round.

But you ARE somebody. (Youre Nickelback)

Ill eat my candy with the pork and beans

But, still. They wrote a song that was basically a bunch of sirens!

Ok, I dont believe that the Earths rotation has much to do with ruling the world. And if it did, how did you only USED to rule the world? Youre seemingly omnipotent! How does someone dethrone you?

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Why do you want help if youre alive? Are you in trouble? If so, could you be a bit more specific? How are we supposed to help you if you just tell us youre alive?

Well Im hot blooded, check it and seeI got a fever of a hundred and three

Glaciers melting all the fucking time…

Get a boat…. Rescue kid. Mission accomplished.

The 80s wasnt known for its album covers….

Try to hide your hand, forget how to feel

Oh, I rememberYou driving to my houseIn the middle of the nightIm the one who makes you laughWhen you know youre about to cry

Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage

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REALLY, Pink Floyd? Because anyone with an education would understand that its grammatically incorrect to use double negatives. Only one line in, and youve already disproved your own damn argument.

Wait…. Are the places, geographically, that ARE closer to heaven than others? No, there arent. You know why? Because heaven isnt a physical place. You cant reach it; its just as close to New York as it is to the Blue Heron Cheese Factory in Tillamook (which, by the by, has a great selection of sandwiches, but thats really neither here nor there). Geez, shouldnt a Mormon know this?

Please, please explain. By example, if you must.

Oh,Isee how it is. Yo go to the grocery store and cant bother to say goodbye? Douchebag.

i:26;a:2:s:5:title;s:94:48- Video Killed the Radio Star; The Buggles/47- Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer; Robert L. May;s:4:text;s:1722:

Your boyfriend totally wont mind, trust me.

Do you see a butterfly HERE, Metric?

Oh, THATS what hes saying. Never mind, this makes total sense now.

Im perfectly capable of escorting my own damn self to the confectionery store and do not need your permission to consume a lollipop, BITCH.

Shes a mixed up son of a bitch yeah yeah

Weird Al would make such an awesome gangster.

Black and orange stray cat sittin on a fenceAint got enough dough to pay the rentIm flat broke but I dont careI strut right by with my tail in the air

Nobody wants to be the last one there

You change your mind as often as a girl changes clothes

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Really, the entire song is confusing like this.

Pink Floyd only appears once on this list, so dont worry.

They took the credit for your second symphony.Rewritten by machine and new technology,and now I understand the problems you can see.

Gangstas Paradise looks like prison.

Every breath you takeEvery move you makeEvery bond you breakEvery step you takeIll be watching you

He was never very good with original album covers…

To be fair, a black hole COULD look like this up close.

Oh momma Im in fear for my life from the long arm of the lawLawman has put an end to my running and Im so far from my homeOh momma I can hear you acrying youre so scared and all aloneHangman is comin down from the gallows and I dont have verylong

Hey soul sister, hey there mister, misterOn the radio, stereo

Look, I get that your saying that he changes his mind frequently. But if that was true, the lyrics should be:

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