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The 10 Most Often Butchered Song Lyrics

Actual Lyric:Call me when you try to wake her.

Misheard Lyric:The girl with colitis goes by.

Actual Lyric:Theres a bad moon on the rise.

Accordingto Jeanne Basone, who went by Hollywood in the GLOW ring, some of the match gimmicks were not exactly what anyone would consider tasteful. Basone and other wrestlers would invoke Nazi iconography by singing German marching songs and tossing gas masks at opponents; in another bit, a woman was forced into a straitjacket, which prompted angry viewer letters complaining that GLOW was mocking the mentally ill. Basone says the series toned down in later seasons, but during the first two years, We got away with a lot.

Just look at them! The family resemblance is uncanny, but people have put serious thought into this hilarioustheoryStranger Things, likeParks and Rec, takes place in Indiana. If Steve and Nancy got unexpectedly pregnant soon after the events of the show, their kid would be Jean-Ralphios age. They probably wouldnt be equipped to parent, considering all the trauma theyve been through. So what if Steves older brother came back from medical school and took the baby in? Enter Dr. Saperstein, whos suddenly a tragic figure. No wonder he spoils Jean-Ralphio (Ben Schwartz) rotten: he knows his real dad is in the psych ward.

Parks and Recreationmight be a sunny, silly sitcom, but its surprisingly good fodder for fan theories. Pawnee, Indianas small town quirks, from the Zorp-worshipping cult to the horrifying art in city hall, lend themselves perfectly to crackpot ideas. Is Jerry a sleeper agent? Did Ron leave behind a treasure map? Anythings fair game, but we know at least one thing to be true: Jean-Ralphio is definitely the son ofStranger Thingss Steve Harrington. Here are 10 other wild ideas.

Misheard Lyric:A year has passed since I broke my nose.

In his original will, Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman) left all his possessions to the man or animal who has killed me. It was handwritten on a scrap of paper, with a bunch of random symbols above the signature. (Heres aclose-up.) Reddit thinks those symbols arent so random; theyre clues pointing to Rons buried gold. The whole thing is prettycomplicated, but basically, the loot is in an old pioneer grave and Ron expected his killer to bury him on Deadmans Island.

A curiously compelling blend of pro wrestling and roller derby, the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling (GLOW) debuted in 1986 with the expectation that wrestling fans would flock to an all-female roster of grapplers with names like Matilda the Hun, Jail Bait, and Babe the Farmers Daughter.

Considering the limited amount of clothing that adorned Bon Jovis female fans in 1986, when this song was released as the second single from the New Jersey nativesSlippery When Wetalbum, thealtered lineseems somewhat appropriate.

To help perpetuate the rivalries featured onGLOW, the productioninsistedthat the women favored by the audience traveled on a separate bus and were forbidden to fraternize with their onscreen enemies. But while they were filming in Las Vegas, the castliveddorm-styletwo to a room at theRiviera Hotel. In a bit of method wrestling, the women were alsoinstructedto call themselves only by their character names regardless of whether they were performing or not.

The 10 Most Often Butchered Song Lyrics

In 2008, hearing aid manufacturer Amplifon polled more than2000 music fansto determine the most often misheard lyrics. Stings former band topped the mondegreen chart with two songs; though Message in a Bottle made the top 10, the number one song was When The World is Running Down, in which you make the best of whats still around is understood as you make the best homemade stew around.

Misheard Lyric:I got my first real sex dream…

Scantily clad women putting one another in choke holds may never be considered legitimate athletics, but GLOW had no pretenses about its mission: Offer a campy, kitschy show that maximized the sex appeal of its stars. The wrestling bouts were interspersed with comedic skits, including ones in which the sore grapplerswould visitteam physicians Dr. Fiel and Dr. Grope.

Bryan Adams 1984 ode to teenage-dom took on an unintended carnal tone whenmany listeners misheardthe opening lyric, which sounded even more bizarre when considered with the content that followed:

Actual Lyric:Hold me closer, tiny dancer.

Actual Lyric:The girl with kaleidoscope eyes.

As a result of the Chicago Bears releasing a successfulsingle, The Super Bowl Shuffle, a few years earlier, the women of GLOW would typically begin each episode with a rap. Theres really no substitution for seeing it for yourself.

Actual Lyric:A year has passed since I wrote my note.

In the premiere episode ofFriends third season, Phoebe Buffay stated what millions of others had also believed when she claimed that the most romantic song ever was the one that Elton John wrote for that guy onWhos The Boss Hold me close, young Tony Danza. Typicallythe line is heard asHold me closer, Tony Danza so we may need Angela to sort this one out.

The Fab Four were certainly known to get a little psychedelic on occasion. (Witness: I am the walrus goo goo gjoob!) Few songs reflect their penchant for writing under the influence of drugs better than this song, the title itself a mnemonic for their drug of choice. Though John Lennon claimed the song was inspired by a picture drawn by his son, Julian, Paul McCartney admitted in a 2004 interview withUncutthat it was indeed about drugs. But even a hallucinogen doesnt explain whypoor Lucys colon would be inflamed.

Actual Lyric:Revved up like a Deuce, another runner in the night.

Mark Brendanawicz (Paul Schneider) was a key player in the first two seasons ofParks and Recreation, serving as a love interest for Leslie and then Ann. But at the end of season two, he quits his job as city planner and is never seen or heard from again. No one evenmentionshim. This is pretty strange, considering how frequently the show revisits side characters like Tammy II (Megan Mullally) or Greg Pikitis (Cody Klop). Tumblr has a simple, bleak explanation:he died. This theory suggests Mark ended his life, which is why no one talks about it, or that it was the Illuminati.

Actual Lyric:I got my first real six-string

Actual Lyric:It doesnt make a difference if we make it or not.

Jimi himself was known to have some fun with what is probably the most widely known mondegreen, often singing the incorrect lyrics on stageoccasionally even accompanied by amock make-out session. Theres even a Website, , dedicated to collecting user-generated stories of misheard lyrics.

Matt Cimber (actress Jayne Mansfields ex-husband) was GLOWs recurring director, and was aiming to create a kind of wrestling expressionist art piece.If you look at GLOW carefully, especially the first two years, GLOW is existentialist, Cimber toldCanoe Sportsearlier this year. The paintings on their faces, the symbolism of their characters, theyre off the wall. And yet, the one thing is I always stayed in a guideline, make sure the audiences understands them. Dont make it so heady and so arty that people think its a bunch of crap. Cimber also asserted that McLane wanted a more serious show and left during the second season to pursue other opportunities.

GLOW: The Story of the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling

Working in the public sector of Pawnee, Indiana, doesnt seem like a lucrative gig, yet Leslie (Amy Poehler) always seems to have money for extravagant gifts. She gives Ben (Adam Scott) a painstakingly replicated Iron Throne, all her girlfriends get custom art for Galentines Day, and she gives Ann (Rashida Jones) presents on each of her made-up holidaysincluding, but not limited to, Breakfast Day.Reddit speculatesthat Leslie inherited a large sum of money when her father died or is living off a trust fund. Because how else could she pay for Rons (Nick Offerman) fantasy trip to Scotland?

Misheard Lyric:Like a virgin, touched for the thirty-first time.

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In 2010, the folks at Cerumol Olive Oil Ear Drops conducted their own poll in Britain, which determined that four out of every 10 people havemisunderstood the lyrics to a popular song. The main culprit? This ditty from Michael Stipe and his cronies, released on the bands 1992 album,Automatic for the People. The most unexplainable part might be the three-syllable difference between the real lyrics and the song as its popularly heard.

Actual Lyric:Scuse me, while I kiss the sky.

Actual Lyric:Like a virgin, touched for the very first time.

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Misheard Lyric:Scuse me, while I kiss this guy.

GLOW was thebrainchildof wrestling fan-turned-promoter David McLane and Jackie Stallone (Sylvesters mom) who saw an opportunity to recreate the heyday of womens wrestling in the 1950s by casting actresses as broad types like bullies, housewives, and Cold War-era spies. To fill out his roster for the 1986-1987 season, McLaneauditionedwomen in Los Angeles by having them train three nights a week in a wrestling ring. Their trainer, former wrestler Mando Guerrero, was partial to grueling, highly physical sessions that included choking at least one trainee unconscious. One former GLOW star, Dawn Maetas,toldtheToronto Starthat the prep work felt like my organs hurt.

Living at the Riviera in Vegas, the GLOW women were given a curfew in an attempt to keep them from indulging in the Sin City nightlife. According to women interviewed for the documentaryGLOW: The Story of the Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling, producers would fine the women $250 if they were caught coming back to the hotel past their allotted time.

If Jerry isnt a cult leader, hes definitely a sleeper agent. Think about it: Hes got tons of skills, from piano playing to painting. He has a beautiful, unbelievably perfect family. He managed to snag a government job, where he has access to all sorts of sensitive information, even though hes supposedly incompetent. And he gets very anxious when his coworkers decide to dig up dirt on each other.Fans thinkthe entire Gergich family is in on the act, making theirChristmas partiesall the more sinister.

Its difficult to hear this classic rock tune and not imagine the feminine product aisle at Walgreens. In 1993, the first sketch in Canadian comedy group The Vacant Lots television series explored themany incorrect renditionsof this lyric that exist.

Weve all been guilty of mishearingand then repeatinga song lyric on occasion. In fact, its so prevalent a problem that theres actually a word for it: mondegreen, a term coined by writer Sylvia Wright in a 1954 essay, in which she recounted her misunderstanding of the line and laid him on the green from The Bonnie Earl OMurray as Lady Mondegreen. So heres a friendly heads-up on the song lyrics that get butchered most often.


While GLOW was a modest ratings success, none of the cast was asked back following the fourth season. The abrupt ending wasreportedlythe result of financier and Riviera hotel owner Meshulam Riklis withdrawing his participation in the project at the behest of his then-wife, entertainer Pia Zadora. (The GLOW property is currentlyownedby former performer Ursula Hayden, who portrayed Babe the Farmers Daughter on the original series and is a consultant on the Netflix series.)

Remember theReasonablists? Theyre Pawnees resident doomsday cult. The Reasonablists believe Zorp is coming to destroy the world, although theyve been wrong about that many, many times. Its safe to say this cult is error-prone. You know who else is error-prone? Jerry Gergich (Jim OHeir). One wild fan theoryclaimsthat Jerry was the original leader of the Reasonablists, back when they materialized in the 1970s. Hes the right age for it and, more importantly, hes very good at winning people over. Despite all their insults, Leslie and her team still love and support Jerry. He also managed to get Christie Brinkley (Gayle) to marry him! Jerry eventually becomes an incredibly popular mayor, as we see in the flash-forwards. Did his old cult turn out the vote in his favor? We may never know.

Theevidence hereis pretty damning: Andy Dwyer (Chris Pratt) and Andy fromToy Storyshare the same first name. They have a mutual enthusiasm for guitars. Theyre both playful and childish (inToy StoryAndys case, because hes literally a child). Could Andy Dwyer be the grown-up version of Buzz and Woodys best friend? It sure sounds like it, especially when you consider his dream of becoming a cop. Maybe because his favorite toys growing up were aspace ranger and sheriff?!

Madonnas ever-present Boy Toy belt buckle probably didnt do much to help dispel thismisheardand rather laughablelyricin the artists first number-one hit.

Colleen Hayes, NBCUniversal Media, LLC

Misheard Lyric:It doesnt make a difference if were naked or not.

As weve learned from the gruesome paintings hanging in Pawnee City Hall, the area has a dark history. The first Pawnee settlers slaughtered indiscriminately by the Wamapoke Tribe, leaving behind just a few descendants, like Chief Ken Hotate (Jonathan Joss). But Ken is doing pretty welland so are the rest of the Wamapoke. They have a prosperous casino and great government connections. Meanwhile, the rest of Pawnee is struggling, as the frequent budget cuts and flailing city officials make clear. Some fansbelievethe Wamapoke cursed Pawnee, ensuring wealth for their people and doom for their oppressors.

Dont believe everything you hear. Particularly if its set to music and coming out of the mouth of one of your favorite musicians.

Misheard Lyric:Theres a bathroom on the right.

Although it lasted four seasons, it never quite took off the way its organizers planned.GLOW, Netflixs fictionalized account of the promotions struggles, is set to debut its second season on June 29. To celebrate the return of the streaming hit, lets take a look at some facts about the all-womens squared circle.

Misheard Lyric:Hold me closer, Tony Danza.

Like Jimi Hendrix before him, CCR frontman John Fogerty has played along with this lyrical misunderstanding. On stage, heoften delivers the lineas if he were giving directions to the lavatory, complete with hand gestures.

This theoryhas to do with Rashida Joness pre-Parksgig as Karen Filippelli onThe Office. The story goes that Karen ended up being a star witness in the Scranton Strangler trial. Due to the cases high profile, she entered the witness protection program. They sent her to the tiny town of Pawnee, Indiana, with a new alias: Ann Perkins.

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Misheard Lyric:Wrapped up like a douche, another rumor in the night.

Since GLOW went off the air in 1992, some cast members have continued to pursue business opportunities as a result of their notoriety. Earlier this year, Jeanne Basone, a.k.a. Hollywood, toldThrillistthat she accepts engagements to wrestle fans in private, often in hotel rooms. Its mostly just fans from GLOW, Basone said. We are just wrestling. I make that clear from the start.

Ice Town is a pretty dumb idea, even for a teen mayor. But teens do dumb things when their hormones kick in, and we know from his roller rink birthday party that Ben has a thing for women on skates. Did he bankrupt his hometown just to see a bunch of ladies on skates? Its notnotpossible.

While pro wrestling was already a sort of parody of itself, GLOW seemed to take it a step further, minimizing any serious choreography in favor of more bombastic comedy. That didnt sit well with female wrestlers outside of the promotion, who perceived GLOW as denigrating their profession. Wrestler Malia Hosaka oncecommentedthat she had no respect for [GLOW]. I actually had one GLOW girl tell me they were out there to make fun of womens wrestling Basically, youre telling me that youre out there to degrade those that have paved the way for you to have this.


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